Category: Safety

Minutes from Friday’s safety meeting, taken by Doreen, who was awake for about half of it. Item one: the forklift is not a toy, and it is not a bed. Item two: nobody is to climb the pallet stack of paper towels. We know it looks good. It collapsed.

Item three: the loading ramp must be cleared of birds, and we agreed that clearing means ‘watch them from the window.’ Item four: the dented bumper on Dock 4 remains dented. It is part of the charm.

Gus closed the meeting by saying ‘be safe’ and then immediately fell asleep on the minutes. The next meeting is in October, assuming we can find the minutes.

Folks, we had a situation on Tuesday. A shipment of eight upright vacuum cleaners arrived at Dock 2, and the crew did what any sensible crew does. They left. For six hours. The dock was empty and the vacuums sat there in the afternoon heat, humming faintly with menace.

Doreen eventually got them loaded by backing the truck in tail first and never looking at them. We billed the customer a Hazard Handling Fee of $85 per unit. The customer asked what hazard. I told him to ask his own cat.

Reminder: vacuums are Class Dread cargo. Quote accordingly.