Ditch runs the night shift, and he does not talk much. Last Thursday I asked him about his route. He said, ‘Kitchen to bedroom. Three AM. Full speed.’ That was the whole answer.
Here is what we know. The load is one live toy mouse and a rolled sock. The route covers 42 feet of hardwood, one staircase and a hallway rug that is known to bunch. Ditch makes the trip in under four seconds, screaming the whole way, and he always arrives with the load intact.
The customer, asleep at the time, has filed zero complaints. We take that as five stars. Night service is available on request at $19 flat.
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